Author: Bruce McLarty

Another day, more radiation.
Got up early, around 5am. Had breakfast, meds, coffee. Watched the news. Got the day started. Zofran for nausea, then time for chemo meds. I took them. Time to get dressed and head to the treatment center. We leave at a nice early time. Pull up and valet. They’re starting to get used to us and know us. Daily trips there will now be the norm. I check in and wait maybe 5 minutes. They wheel me back and strap me in. I noticed there was no green laser light so I thought maybe just maybe it was a placebo kind of effect. Not so. I ask the tech after and he said they turn it off for some patients so it doesn’t blind them. I am a creature of habit so I tell them it was like Picard with the 4 lights.

Easy enough, these appointments are only 15 minutes for the radiation. I’m glad I have the oral chemo and not the port for infusion. That would keep me there for hours. In and out is a breeze. Upon entry to the radiation appointment, there were some free beanie hats. I nabbed a blue one as it’s my fav color. Didn’t try it on til much after on the way home. Way too small. I may bring it back tomorrow for someone else to have. I mean, this was really small. How did I not notice this would not fit my melon of a head. I mean small, comicly small.

The constipation wasn’t as prevalent today. I did have a couple bm’s. The head sweating from the radiation/chemo started after we left. I had a couple of sweaty bouts today. Fatigue is there. I have had a couple naps today. Maybe 45-an hour each one. No loss of appetite just yet. I have some protein shakes for when that happens. I have been hydrating with water and Nectar hydration multiplyer. It’s pretty tasty. I had a lemon flavored one this morning and a watermelon flavored one this afternoon. This seems to help with side effects. Stay hydrated everyone.

My wife took me to my appointments this week. My mom is going to take me tomorrow. We will work out a schedule for both of them to take me next week. I will discuss tomorrow with mom to see what days she can take me to alleviate some stress and time for my wife. It’s always nice to have some help with things. When help is offered, we will take it. Plus it will be nice to hang with mom outside of the house. I have a couple errands to run tomorrow and her being retired will allow me to go a couple places.

I’m waiting on some refills for my chemo meds. The doorbell rang but I couldn’t get there in time. They didn’t leave a note on the door. I hope I didn’t miss the delivery. I was asleep and didn’t get to it in time. Oh bother, very frustrating.

My mom is going to bring my nephews Nintendo Switch for me to use. I couldn’t see getting one on limited income, especially at $200. I will borrow his as he doesn’t even use it. I ordered a game cartridge for it that has 150 old school Atari games. Very nostalgic. It was only $14 on Amazon. Much better than spending $200. Thank God kids don’t stick with things lol. They’re charging it up for me today so I can use it asap. It should be fun. I haven’t played any Atari games since the 80’s. Hopefully it will be just as fun as I remember.

Thank you for stopping by
~Bruce

Good afternoon everyone,
I had my breakfast early like usual. Took my meds then waited to take my chemo meds. Those have to be taken an hour before the radiation. I also had to take some zofran for nausea. Today was my second day of Radiation therapy. My appointment was at 7:45am. I got there at 7:30am. Waited in the area for like 5 mins and they brought me back. Snapped me in and Radiation was underway. After the radiation we met with the Radiation Dr. That all went well. He was only there for like 2 minutes to see if we had any questions regarding the treatment thus far. We did not. Said he would see us next week then. Got finished and they discharged us for the day. Tomorrow will be round 3 at 7:45am, then on to the 8:30am appointments.

I have really only had a few side effects so far. Last night I had some head and neck sweating. Chemo side effect, so they tell me. Today on the way to the appointment I had a bit of nausea as I was drinking some water. Not bad at all. I have also had some constipation. No movement yet but the urge is there. I’m hopeful to poo soon. I don’t need any GI issues especially constipation. I haven’t had any loss of appetite just yet. I am hungry and snacky.

I have some Nectar hydration booster to help with nausea. I saw an ad on social media for it. Supposedly it helps chemo/rad patients battle nausea through hydration relief. I have had two packets today. Quite tasty, no sugar in it. I may have to get some more soon if I use 2/day.

During the radiation therapy, I felt a warm sensation on my brainstem. I felt like I was being cooked. Maybe it’s just my mind thinking of the radiation. Maybe it’s actually cooking my Tumor to shrink it down. I’ll ask tomorrow when I go. But I did feel the warmth. It was weird.

I like the early appointments for the Radiation so I can come home and rest from it. No anticipation and waiting around all day for the treatment. I am an early riser so this is ideal for me.

I spent the day by myself today. I prepared my lunch, ate it and rested. I ordered a new coffee cup today. I wanted a larger one so I could make more and it has a lid. I should be able to carry it without spilling or having to worry about a spill or slosh. I’m low on my stool softener so I looked online for the best deal. I have some coming from Costco, 400 capsules for only $6. Near $20 at Publix for only 100. Amazon was not cost effective either.

Thank you for stopping by. I’ll give more chemo/radiation updates tomorrow.
~Bruce

Today I got up and had breakfast. My phone started ringing at 7:30 a.m. It was the cancer center. Why are you calling me so early? They wanted me in early. I told them I couldn’t as I was ride-dependent. They called again at 7:45 a.m. Are you sure you can’t come early? Yes, I am sure, but I will come as soon as I can. My appointment was for 3:45 p.m. and blood work at 12:45 p.m. Y’all gotta just let me come when I can. I told them I’d try to be in around 2:15 p.m. I got there at 2:30 p.m. That’s earlier than my appointment. You should be happy.

The first radiation went without a hitch. Not too bad, wheel me back, strap me in with the mask. Make adjustments to the bed and we are underway. The radiation only took about 15 minutes. I just closed my eyes and went to a faraway place. I imagined I was soaring through the clouds like an eagle overlooking our great country. It was peaceful and serene. The table vibrated here and there when it was adjusting. It didn’t bother me. They gave me some kind of ring dog toy to hold on to. Kinda squishy, blue in color. I just held it and soared.

After this, I made my way to the second floor. Blood draw time. The tech there is so sweet. We talked about donuts. Oh, how I’d love a donut. She said she was not a fan of Dunkin. I don’t blame you, me either. I just like a plain original yeast donut or an old-fashioned sour cream donut. Sign me up for all of those. Don’t give me any flavors, etc. Just original.

I rode in my Jeep for the first time in what seems like months. It was nice to ride in Rooster. How I’ve missed that truck. My wife has been using my Jeep. I said, “Oh, you’ve put some miles on him.” lol She is confident driving it now. I can tell as she corners faster and has much more command of it without questioning herself.

I’m glad to be done with the first treatment. I know how it will go now. They took 3 appointments off my schedule, so instead of 33, I now only have 30—strike that, 29 more after today. I was told chemo and radiation are cumulative, so I may not feel side effects for a bit. I’m fine with that. Knowing what I’m in for makes it easier. I’m sure I will have some fatigue from it. Let’s hope the nausea and stomach issues stay at bay.

1 down, 29 to go. Let’s do this! I’m so glad the first one is under my belt and I am done with it. It’s a real relief. Tomorrow’s appointment is at 7:45 AM, then the neuro-oncologist at 9 AM.

So far, no side effects from chemo or radiation. Slight fatigue, but that could be just from the anticipation of the day. Idk. I’ll get through it. I’m going in headfirst, pun intended. One day at a time. We got this! So far, so good. Is that enough platitudes?

Thank you for stopping by to read about my day!
~Bruce

As you know, tomorrow, I start my chemo and radiation treatment. I’m nervous as stated before. I know I’ve prepared as much as I can for all possible outcomes. I’ve got some nausea meds, bags, hydration help, fruits, veggies, protein shakes, burn cream, and more. I don’t know how the treatment can go. I’ve read many different stories on how others handle the chemo and radiation. My appointment is at 3:45pm. They have asked me to come in at 3:15. I have bloodwork at 12:45 but they said at the last blood draw I can come closer to my other appointed time. That will make it much easier on me and my wife.

Today was an easy day. No appointments, no calls, light Memorial Day. I’ll take it. I cherish the easy days as I know I have some hard ones ahead. Here’s to the last of one of the easy ones. I pray that God will guide me through these hard days one day at a time. I know I can make it with his help. I have such a strong support system around me with family and friends. They have all made it so easy and have been so helpful throughout this diagnosis. I can’t thank them enough.

On this Memorial Day, let’s give thanks to those who gave their all for our Freedom.

Thank you for stopping by.
~Bruce

I almost didn’t want to blog today, but something inside me told me to go ahead. Not as much fatigue as yesterday, thank God. Some fatigue. I started my day like usual. We got to sleep until about 7:30 a.m. The boys let us today. No crying from them.

I had my breakfast. I watched a bit of the news. Then Formula Grand Prix Sunday started, so I watched the pre-race show for the Monaco GP. It was good. Monaco is a historic race, not much passing or wheel-to-wheel action. They introduced a mandatory 2 pit stop rule this year, and you have to change tire compounds to utilize 3 different compounds. It didn’t have any effect on the race per se. Just a lot more pit action. Max led a lot of the race. He was forced to pit on the last lap to complete his allocation. Lando, Charles, and Oscar on the podium. 2 McLarens split by a Ferrari. Not a bad result. I was hoping Charles Leclerc would win for his home race. Oh well.

Then on to the Indy 500. I watched the pre-race for that one as well. The rain delay put it behind by about an hour, which put us behind on our breakfast meal prep. Kyle Larson was talking trash about how he was a better driver than Max Verstappen… Nah bro, you just compete in more events than him. You definitely are not a better driver than MV1. Ask Franz Hermann about the Nordschleife lap. Alex Palou takes the checkered flag for the Indy 500, leading from laps 187-200. Good action.

About midway through the race, we decided to start our egg bites. Today, I blended a half bag of spinach into the egg mixture. It should be very good. It’s funny that the spinach floated to the top of the egg bites. All green tops and yellow bottoms, funny. I got a steamer pot in to cut the time down. I think they cook way faster on the stove in the steamer pot than in the instant pot’s steam function. Didn’t spray the cup molds this time, and they still popped right out. I cracked 36 eggs today. We still have a bag from last week in the freezer for this week. The 36 eggs we made today made 49 egg bites. This should cover us for a couple of weeks while I get used to the chemo and radiation. I hope it doesn’t knock me down too much. I’ve read conflicting experiences regarding fatigue and post-radiation feelings.

I got done with the egg bites, and there were about 30 laps left of the 500. I watched the rest of it to see Palou take the checkered flag. We had 3 pots going for the egg bites, 2 on the stove and one in the instant pot.

I made a turkey sandwich and BBQ Doritos for lunch today. They’re good. Tangy and spicy. Whenever Chip hears the turkey box open, he comes running. He loves honey smoked turkey. I always have to give him a piece of turkey as a tax when I am making my sandwich. Tonight, I made some salmon for the wife, and I had some Italian chicken meatballs and veggie pasta marinara. That was pretty good.

Now I’m just finishing this blog, hanging with my Chippah and watching Food Network. I like 24 in 24. I’d love to compete on a cooking show. Even if I didn’t win, it would be an experience of a lifetime. To meet a celebrity chef or compete against other home cooks would be so rad.

I almost forgot my steroid. Just took it. Random thoughts run rampant at times. Sometimes I wish I were a cat so I didn’t have to think about what is to come. I have nothing for tomorrow as it’s Memorial Day. Chemo and radiation start Tuesday afternoon. I am nervous. I am scared. I am ready.
Let’s get it going!

Thank you for stopping by to read my nonsense today. I love you all. Stay positive; I am.
~Bruce

Today started out early. Chip wanted to get up at 6am. We wanted to sleep til 7am. Chip won. I got up around 6:45am. Got my breakfast and coffee. Took my meds and started my day. I didn’t realize today would bring such fatigue. I didn’t even do much today. No exercise. Just had breakfast and lunch and felt so exhausted. Made a ham and turkey sandwich with swiss. It was good. My wife took Chip to the vet for his monthly injection. He has a luxating patella, his knee pops out of socket. It doesn’t bother his day to day running etc. It just looks bad. He still tears through the house like a banshee.

The fatigue hit me hard today. I have been so tired. I took a small nap this afternoon. I can only imagine what next week will bring when I start radiation and chemo. If it’s this hard now, what will happen then?

I ordered some nuts.com items yesterday. They came today. I got some churro almonds. Very good. A friend sent some salted roasted cashews. I love them. Snacks are my friend right now. I have to be mindful not to snack all day. Boredom can set in and you can find yourself eating out of boredom. I noticed this in my heavier days too. I have gained a couple pounds but not much. Just have to be sure I’m not snacking too much. Gotta keep trim. It’s ok if I put on a couple because I know I’ll lose some during treatment. But I don’t want to go overboard with my weight. I’ve heard your tastes can change during chemo and radiation and I’m not looking forward to that. I enjoy my foods. I have prepped for whatever I think I may go through but there is always the unknown aspect of life.

Last night we had some Qdoba tacos. Not great. Actually it sucked. The tacos fell apart. Taco Bell would have honestly been a better choice overall. Crazy right? Taco Bell? I would have rather had a beefy 5 layer or some soft tacos. Yeah well, qdoba stunk. My turkey and ham sandwich today was better than the tacos last night.

That’s about it today. Tired and wobbly. Nerves are balled up for the upcoming week. I’ll get through it. I’m ready to start. Nervous but ready.

Thank you for stopping by.
~Bruce

Today was a slow day so I took it upon myself to give a mindless project. Let’s clean up some old emails. Took me most of the day. I had over 135,000 emails in my gmail account. Delete 50 at a time. Too many new and important medical emails to bulk delete them all. I had to charge my laptop once already. I ate lunch, took in a delivery order. Put that away. Got cleaned up and went back to deleting. Just finished. Click all, delete. Back and forth. Like I said, mindless project but had to be done.

The boys stayed away most of the day. Pancake did his social flops in the kitchen as I’m preparing my lunch. I bent down and pet him. That’s what he wanted. He likes to flop down right in your way. Sometimes it’s a swarming at my feet. Sometimes he headbutts my legs, sometimes he licks my legs. Today was all of the above. Chip has been keeping his distance today except for when the delivery came. He was so nosy looking in the box to see what I ordered. Bananas, chicken, and other things. Nosy little boy. I told him to leave me be and allow me to put things away. He just wanted to inspect everything that came in. Toilet paper, water. Is this so important to you?

Our friend had an MRI yesterday and they found another tumor in her brain. She goes for surgery in June. We are devastated for her. She is the one who came by a few weeks ago and prayed with me. She is the most calming soul I know. She doesn’t deserve this. None of us do. So many people with cancer now. It’s madness. What is this spike increase in cancers lately? I can’t believe how many people myself included have been diagnosed over the past couple years. It’s truly heartbreaking to see it so close to home. We are praying daily, multiple times a day. Is this what life is as you get older? Do we all eventually succumb to this disease? What the actual?

It can be hard to stay positive when everyone you know is coming down with this. It’s nuts. Sorry not sorry. Just venting for myself and others that need the outlet. Madness I tell ya!

I will continue to stay focused and positive. I am starting radiation and chemo Tuesday. I gotta stay focused on this. My nerves are a ball of mess right now. I don’t know how the treatment will affect me. I will cross that bridge when I get to it. I have prepared as much as I can for it. I think I have all the supplies I need.

Thank you for stopping by.
~Bruce

Let’s go back to the 80’s. I’m riding my bike through the large front yard where we lived. My little sis and I would cross through two trees and say it was a time machine. There was a huge canal to our right. Very deep, maybe 10 feet by 6 feet wide. Some neighbors would use these vines to swing across the canal. I was a skinny little thing then. I was too afraid to swing across, so any ball or anything of the sort stayed there. The lot next to us was empty. Lots of cows behind in a pasture from my stepdads Uncle WP. There was a swamp lake in the center behind us. Step would tell us that Jason lived there and to stay away. It was like a mini Crystal Lake. Covered in green foliage/moss. I don’t know exactly what it was. My grandaddy lived behind us in a small camper trailer with his dog Rocket. He would run and run.

Rocket was a cool dog. He would chase us and bark as we rode by. We also had a trampoline back there. During the rain we would get some dish soap and slip and slide all over the trampoline. Dangerous but fun. Once my brother fell off and sprained his arm. It was funny but painful. When I was much younger at a different house we were shooting bb guns and I was standing there. The bb ricocheted off a plastic bucket and caught me below the eye. You’ll shoot your eye out. I felt it. My mom and granny had a church meeting or something happening and we had to interrupt it with a bloody and swollen face/eye.

At the time of this I was maybe 7. My sis was 5-6. She at the time, was my unexpected guide. I thought this was the coolest time machine. Riding as fast as we could splitting these two trees on the drive in. There were loads of snakes around. Glass black snakes. Once our dog Bud, a stray english mastiff, grabbed a snake and shook it. Scary, we were freaked out. We never saw him do this before. It was insane. We would go out and ride many many times through the time machine. It was such fun.

Memories can trigger passages of time that you had forgotten. Just seeing or hearing this can take you back. Way back. almost 40 years back. I remember my BMX, it was grey with white tires and grey plates on the spokes. Hard white seat, I hated that seat. My sis had a Rainbow Brite bike with streamers on the bars. I thought it was the fastest bike at the time. She was a powerhouse riding it through the dirt and gravel drive. If I asked her, I know for a fact she’d remember the time machine. We haven’t spoken about this in that many years. I know her memories would flood back to those days of riding and riding. FUN TIMES!

Thank you for stopping by!
~Bruce

Today was a good day. I had the day off basically. I started with my morning routine. Got dressed, bathed, and checked my email. Nothing to do today.

Today I texted my wife that I needed more shirts with a pocket on the chest. I found that I can carry some nuts—almonds, cashews, and pecans—in my shirt pocket, i.e., pocket nuts. She laughed and said that would be a good title today. So Pocket Nuts it is. I once saw a guy on FB talking about pocket cilantro. I thought it was funny. He said if you carry around herbs or something in your pocket, it is easier to access when going somewhere without a container or pocket. I thought that was genius, so I took the idea for Pocket Nuts. I only have a couple of shirts with pockets. I did mix some pecans and cashews today in a container because I had no pocket for my nuts.

My day today was alone. I always keep my cell in my pocket in case I have an accident or fall or something. I always use my cane. I made lunch myself, heated up some rotisserie chicken and some hot sauce. Like a boneless wing, basically. Yummy. No family to hang with today. Mom stayed home. My in-laws, who are normally off on a Wednesday, had a few appointments scheduled as it is their only day off to complete their tasks, etc.

The boys stayed away, only to check on me twice each so far. Normally at this time they’re in the front room in a sun patch shining in the window. They should be on their way in here soon as the sun starts setting. It’s been so hot out lately. Yesterday it neared 100 degrees. Today, no rain in sight, so it will be in the upper 90s as well. It seems like this could be the hottest part of the year for Florida. The weatherman said this morning it may make for a more active hurricane season. Ugh! It’s not nearly this hot during the active season. This could be the hottest part of summer as well. We aren’t even in summer yet.

I finished Ted Lasso yesterday. What was that ending? I hope that’s not the last season. I’ve been watching Government Cheese. It’s better than the beginning episodes. I think it was just a slow burn.

The RSO capsules have really been helping me sleep through the night. I take a capsule. It helps me drift off into la-la land.

Then we watch some old King of Queens episodes and zzz. She’s so mean to him on there. I can’t stand Carrie. My favorite characters are Arthur and Spence. Comedy gold. I used to always watch Seinfeld, but this is fast becoming a new favorite of mine. I can still quote Seinfeld like my in-laws quote Christmas Vacation or My Cousin Vinny. I’ve seen all the Seinfeld episodes at least 20 times each. I laugh at them like they’re new to this day. Still a top for me. My all-time favorite is Star Trek: TNG. It’s so nostalgic for me. My older brother got me into this show when I was 7. I’ve watched every episode many times. I used to tape it all the time and watch at night. BBC America has since quit playing it.

Light Day, Pocket Nuts

Stay safe everyone, thank you for stopping by to read about my day!
~Bruce

I’ve started a gofundme page as linked below. The funds will help me purchase groceries and supplies during the chemo and radiation period. Please consider helping if you can. It really is appreciated.

https://www.gofundme.com/f/bruces-battle-inoperable-brain-cancer

Or you can donate here to a cancer registry for patients.

https://registry.wegotthis.org/registries/bruce-mclarty

This link allows me to purchase groceries as well via Amazon links and no fees. Thank you so much.

Hey everyone, slow day today. Let’s change it up a bit.
I was thinking about little things that make you happy or bring you joy. For me it’s the following.

Routine:
I enjoy having a routine. It keeps me focused and motivated to what is in store for me. Keeping a routine allows me to keep my head down, not worry about things that can come up out of your control. It keeps you grounded. It can be boring to some but provide structure to others. I am in the others category. My routine is simple. You should know my morning starts by now, wake up, restroom, wash up, eat, watch some news and start my day.

Cats:
I love my furry boys. I have always been a cat person. I’ve had dogs in my day, but cats as bratty as they are, are right in my wheelhouse. They can be annoying, not listen, stubborn, willful jerks. Bengals are a breed of all of this and more. They’re like little dogs that won’t listen. They’re like permanent toddlers. They are so stubborn. I love every moment with them even the trying times. The times where Chip is such a brat when we eat dinner and nothing will calm him. I would not trade a moment of it, no matter how stressed he can get me.

Family:
Seeing my family after diagnosis is completely different than before. It seems that there is more compassion, love and understanding than there was before. Maybe it’s not like that but that’s how I perceive it. I feel closer since this diagnosis. I feel relationships are stronger, conversations are longer, and deeper. Just different.

Spouse:
I am so connected to my wife. More so than ever. She has been a rock for me. Taking care of my every need. Even the smallest thing like carrying a cup of coffee for me. It brings me such joy seeing this. When I see her walk in after work I’m all smiles. I know the person I love is home and here to see me and take care of me. It’s not just the things and tasks performed. It’s all encompassing. Every little thing she do is Magic. Sting

Sustenance:
Even food tastes better after diagnosis. I don’t understand it. I enjoy it more. Water tastes cleaner. Ice feels colder. Sweets are sweeter. Lemonade more lemonadier lol.
I enjoy preparing the ready made meals I get delivered in but it’s not the same as when I could cook fully. But it still brings me joy to prepare and eat.

Well that was a good writing exercise. Thank you for stopping by to share my day. All I really did today was my morning routine, followed by a hang with mom. Then she took me for some bloodwork at the Cancer Center. We came back and started watching a podcast on YouTube. Light day for sure. I like the light days.

~Bruce